idyll state is a collection of written and visual stories that explores life in many forms – from the concrete and pragmatic, to the more abstract and creative.
it is a place of cathartic release.
no reason to feel uncertain, unloved, except the devil inside my head.
The Remote Year group that I’m traveling with goes by the name of Ikigai, a Japanese word that means “reason for being”. I spent all of about two seconds thinking about what my ikigai was on orientation day, but then quickly forgot about it. That is, until a series of events, people, and places re-triggered an inquiry into why I’m here.
Feeling an ethereal and eternal happiness, tears of sadness still streak down my cheeks. Your face appears.
I read because I know what I don’t know. And because I don’t know what I don’t know. I read because it turns what I don’t know I don’t know, into what I know I don’t know, into what I know, and that helps me grow.
You asked me what it was about being alone that I liked...
I like the silence, the sound of nothing filling the air, save my breath. Sometimes I like the sound of music - that of my favorite artist, filling the room, my room. Without anyone telling me quieter, louder or skip to the next track.
there's a fire that burns where the air is dry
life: a question, death: its reply a tender goodbye stay ’til our present slips into the past it’s all that i ask
It is such that moments come and go,
beings birthed and swept away by death.
The stars that shine down on us brilliantly,
expired eons ago.
"– you know, I’ve either had a family, a job, something has always been in the way but now I’ve sold my house, I’ve found this place, a large studio, you should see the space and the light...
From Stephen Cave, author of "Immortality: The Quest to Live Forever and How It Drives Civilization", comes my favorite metaphor about life so far...
In the past two to three years, I've been feeling like a bit of an aberration of myself. Lost at sea, following the motions of the waves without any resistance, without a compass nor a docking port in mind, letting whatever and whomever crosses my path onto my ship and giving them control of it. Always playing middle field and never picking a side.
as with every talent and skill, improvement comes with practice and after reading all these self-help articles and advice columns from other writers, that writing is no exception.
little bright lights levitate in the grey misted sky.
alone. together. alone. together. born alone. die alone. born alone together. die alone together. we live in binaries. without one, the other has no meaning.
My heart fucking hurts. There's this built up pressure inside and it feels like it wants to explode but can't, it's trying to contain itself within these fleshy walls. It's a power struggle between the walls that are trying to contain this explosion and this explosion itself. Who knew hearts were capable of this...
there are times when it feels good to be naked BARE with another her body next to mine warm and trembling her imperfections dissolve into perfections as we melt into one.
Since it's a new year and only a little less than 3 years now till my 30th birthday, I figured I'd compile (it's never too late) a list of 30 (plus 2) things to check off before 30. They are an assortment of random things that I've always wanted to do or have dreamed of accomplishing (literally) and thus are very personal to me.
Eating and drinking what I want when I want is an ACTIVITY that I enjoy and it brings me happiness and variety.
So years later, I've fallen for the marketing fad that is juice cleansing. I've given people many reasons as to why I finally decided to go through with it. They're all legitimate reasons, though I have to admit that ultimately, I'm just a sucker when it comes to marketing fads.